Epiphany!
Honestly, I am grateful for moments of realization.
They say our money beliefs are deeply rooted. They say we are shaped by our environment and the people we grew up around, especially our parents.
And that’s very true.
When it comes to money, I am like my parents. I don’t like to say that out loud but, it’s true. It is easy to criticise them because I am looking from the outside, but I never really saw how similar we were and how much I have copied from them.
It’s okay not to know any better or not to have had proper education about money, I mean, we go to school for over 12 years, for most of us who went on to get a degree and more close to 20 years and we are not taught about money.
I am in my 20s and I am broke, It doesn’t make me happy having to worry so much about money. I am in my 20s and still learning to be comfortable with discussing money. I could dwell on, “I should have been taught this”. But, that would be dwelling on the past.
I have made mistakes when it comes to money, I have let fear direct my decisions about money and spending. And it hasn’t gone so well.
I am in my 20s and I am lucky, I say this a lot. But, if you were in my shoes you’ll understand why I feel so lucky. Everything that has happened to me has opened me up to getting to know myself more, the things I’ll like to improve, and the kind of person I want to be.
Life is short, and life is also very long.
I think that living is understanding this, and finding the balance in it. I have been on a personal development journey for a while now and everything has taken it’s time to unravel. And this period has been mostly about love and money.
Well, this post is about money. *wink
I am unlearning my beliefs about money, I try to ask myself the right questions, like, “what money behaviours did I pick up from my parents?”, “Which ones are helping me, and which ones are causing me great harm?”
I am not insinuating my parents were terrible. Well, when it comes to money, they are not the best, but they are the kindest and the most generous people I know. They are willing to help people out financially and not, but without healthy boundaries, that too may be a problem.
I am an adult now(lol), and I see some of the unhealthy patterns, and it’s easy to point them out in them, forgetting I may have learned them too.
Sometimes, I am willing to give my last dime without thinking about it. As much as this may look like the best trait in a person, there is a point where you draw the line, and if you look deep, you may find things you don’t like. Such as people pleasing, guilt, fear or entitlement. And they are all led by fear.
I am learning every day, and I don’t plan to stop.
I want to unlearn, heal and grow.
So If you are in your 20s too, or if you want to live and not survive, maybe it’s time to look inside. Sort out the unhealthy patterns you may have picked up from your environment or your parents, ask yourself better questions and dig up those unhealthy beliefs.
It may not be about money, it could be about love. *wink
I wish you the best on your journey.
Thank you for reading.
Cindy.
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